A Light-Hearted Review of a 911

Today I was sent to review the Porsche 911 Carrera S, this car is said by many to be the definitive sports car and I was informed that the motoring world would benefit from one of my function over form reviews and that it would provide useful insight for those looking to buy a 911.

I did not want to bias myself so I did not read or watch any content about the car, not even the Porsche press pack as I feared it may affect my serious, sensible reviewing.

As I approached the car I instantly disliked the looks. Many describe them as ‘iconic’ and ‘timeless’, I think ‘unimaginative’ and ‘old’ are more appropriate terms. I dread to think what they had on their mood boards, possibly a series of other dull seemingly retro objects?

I moved to the rear of the car, to check out the most important area, the boot space. I could not find a boot release anywhere just some lines and a badge – what’s the point in that?

I then checked the front to see what engine Porsche had used and found empty space – a front boot – how bizarre. Perhaps it is one of these new-fan-dangled electrical things?

Or not, I turned the key to hear a raucous engine, one I instantly disliked as it would be a complete nuisance to anyone living near one of these impractical cars.

As for the interior, there are four seats but only two doors – black mark there. The seats are really only suitable for children however this is not a family car in the slightest.

I began to drive and hated it, the noise and sporty feel wanted to encourage me to behave in a sporting way and dare I say it, have fun. In the hands of anyone other than myself a car of this nature and performance would induce dangerous driving and frivolous behaviour.

As a result, my appraisal of this car is ‘undriveable’. The performance would stop me from driving this as I would fear it would change my behaviour for the worse. Yes, the suspension and steering are lovely but I cannot recommend this car.

Do comment your thoughts below.

Published in Reviews

Related Posts

Notify of
Newest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
David Olsen-Fabian
1 year ago

That’s a very interesting and honest review of the 911.
I can’t think of many cars that sound better at WOT than a 911. From experience I can tell you that not many cars have the handling characteristics that make the rear engine monster so much fun in the hands of a skilled driver. Put a novice behind the wheel and the rear end is comin round! As they say, “Do You Even LIFT”? NO, because if you let off the throttle mid-turn … the rear end is coming to the front RIGHT NOW. Snap over-steer! Get it right and you are rewarded with serious driving nirvana. The 911 is not for the unskilled novice. It’s NOT a commuter car, though it can be used for such. It’s not your grandpa’s Lincoln. They are sharp, exacting tools for carving apexes. You have to brake before the turn and power out in these. Brake in the turn … rear end is comin round. Lift off the gas … rear end is comin round. Don’t do these things and nothing else is more rewarding!

Logan Page
1 year ago

A very different opinion to my experience in a new Porsche. I personally think that the styling is great although I haven’t got to drive one so can’t comment on actually being behind the wheel

Add to Collection

No Collections

Here you'll find all collections you've created before.